The contact page for a worldly spiritual R-E3vol-ution!
Since everybody has a mission, and „psychos“ have special gifts from God, and are somehow chosen ones, we should change the paradigm from „mental illness“ to spiritual crisis, which the psychic has to be guided through, in order to help others with their mission, for example in special fields of society like science, philosophy, spirituality, medicine, arts, and scholarship etc..
My spiritualized life!
Been born in 1971.
I Had my first peek into the spirit world at 3 years of age, and an otherwise rough and magical childhood.
The peek into the spirit-world happened when my mum brought me to an obligatory oculist visit, and I had to look into an apparatus and identify what I see, but I am quite sure now that the apparatus was maladjusted, either intendedly or due to lack of attention because of the eye doctors age, or because of both.
I saw the picture of a bigger star in the apparatus as opposed to the doctor insisting it had to be a little bird and following, him, prescribing me some 0,25 diopter glasses. And today I surmise that with such a low diopter you can’t confuse a little bird with a bigger star.
In Kindergarten than the Kindergarten teacher asked me why I didn’t want to wear the eyeglasses, and in my desperation i peeked into the spirit world and saw the spirits of the other kids, from where I got the info the other kids would bully me for being a „four-eyes“, because i „Knew“ something was wrong, the teacher kind of wanting to punish or force me to wear the glasses again, and told her the other kids would bully me for being a „four-eyes“.
I also don’t see in retrospective me needing glasses then, because I had a very good vision then, showing itself when I shot with my bow and arrow directly into the third eye of a friend who tortured someone on the stake, while we were playing „cowboys and indians“.
Later in life, I found out that my eyes would somehow get weaker because of the glasses, and I had to, now and then, get stronger glasses, but since I refuse to get new glasses nowadays, my eyesight pretty much stays the same.
I got a bronchial infection with 6 years and almost suffocated from it/wanted to die, because i saw through the System already at the age of 3 while i was photographed and looked into the lense of the camera, and „knew“ I would suffer a lot, but the 666er doctors wouldn’t let me go!
If you ask dear God for help, he/she/it intervenes and answers, as I experienced when I was 17 years old, being a little tipsy, sitting on a swing at night with some friends and thinking to myself and the universe „There must be something more (than this)“, which lead to the fantastic „horrific“ adventure my life wasiswarzbeinzis and immediately kind of ripping me open on the back, as a sign that god heard me!
Smoked my first splif in 1988, when I had a fantastic laughing time and afterward I had some mystical and spiritual experiences, and an otherwise rough, turmoiled and magical youth.
I sat in that year in winter on a snowy hill, when I left, during a skiing trip, the busy main skiing strips and went on a side strip, and when no one was showing up, I sat in total silence, because the snow absorbed all the environmental noises, on a hill in the mountainsite, and had an intense impression of some mystical kind of infinite spirit surrounding me and penetrating the ambiance (difficult to explain with words).
I also had some energetic-spiritual experiences on hash, when I and my hippy friends started to dance and freak out, out of nothing while being stoned.
Once reading a passage out of the New Testament while high on hash, I somehow without a doubt „Knew“ that the Bible is true, and later learned from nde’ers that it also should be interpreted.
Once in the woods me and a friend collected the holy Wapaq (Fly Agaric) and cleaned it in a wood hut that a homeless guy left there, or was it the timetraveller?
We burned the leftovers over a small fire and inhaled the smoke, that was when I returned to myself as i was in heaven on earth and danced my first little dance for the Spirit.
Because I loved and still love music, though my angels silently advised me to acquire a stereo and music media first, to get inspired by this music, I started to learn the guitar first, with the desire to impress people.
A little later in life after some magical experiences, e.g. tripping on acid and giving up fear on the trip, and than dream-traveling into another world, I looked for a creative expression of that all, myself, for my love of music, the arts, writing and the people and I tried to find a true expression of my experiences, and more experiences on a vision quest through the world.
While I traveled through Mexico, I went to Huautla de Jimenez, because I read about this magical mushroom village, from where the famous mushroom healer Maria Sabina stemmed, and after arriving there, I was led to a local known Mazatek Holy Mushroom curandera which really reminded me of my Grandmother.
I had some problems with hair lossand the curanderas (also the invisilble) giggled silently while me telling them, and after she asked me a few times to join a holy mushroom Velada which I refused, because of me not feeling being ready fur such, I later asked the healer myself for a Velada, when I thought I felt ready.
During this holy ceremony, I saw a black devilish-like spirit.
The next day after the ceremony I asked her about this demon, when she answered, that she doesn’t know or don’t understand, because her Spanish and mine were not too good. She also told me, that I am a curandero too, because she saw three Angelitos, each sitting on top of my shoulders and on my head.
I also saw some bigger dogs in the village while i was drunk and when i looked into their eyes I „knew“ that they were shapeshifters because they had absolute human eyes!
Then I was sitting on in Oaxaca Mexico on a park bench, wher I heard the song „Hotel California“ from The Eagles from a music store, and in the song there’s the stabbing of the beast mentioned (synchronicity with the velada), and because of that i started to relate everything to myself and I was so scared to have had now gone crazy, but i suppressed that crazy feeling.
After years of pondering the devil mystery, I learned back in Germany where I saw a guy with a black but peaceful aura, that it was not THE devil which I saw in the Velada, but the spirit of a person that turned away from love-light-god and became darkened, because it cast the light-love out of his aura (soul) and body. I also found out that this darkness is a kind of spiritual and psychological disease.
So in Mexico, I got interested in the healing arts but still was drawn to music and fine arts, which made me been torn between these two professions.
Tripping further through central America, I landed in a rainbow gathering in Guatemala on Lake Atitlan.
During a weeklong stay on the Chinese Full Moon New Years Gathering in mid-February, on a warm evening at the central fire I took a toke from a pure splif and started trippin‘. I went away from the fire towards a high peak over the lake to relax, whence I felt an urge to stop by a pile of stones that looked like a little pyramid, which i surmise was a indigenous graveyard with some more little stone pyramids in the vicinity, from which a green San Pedro like cactus was growing of. Staring at the cactus, it started to transform into a green ghost-man, that wanted to draw me with his mighty power into the dark pyramid abyss. I had to fight really hard to draw myself away from this frightening power ghost. Hurrying to the community oven fire, where a talk-about was happening, I sat with the other guys around the fire, still feeling the power ghost trying to draw me back to the little stone pyramid into the blackness. Sitting there at the oven fire, really afraid, I started since a long time a second first sincere prayer question and said: „Jesus, if you really exist, please help me!“ Suddenly I felt calmer and more secure and felt a strange presence behind me. Curiously I turned around and realized that Jesus had materialized behind my back in a beige robe with long hair and a beard his arms stretched out, like a priest in the Catholic church during his lord’s prayer sermon, trying to protect me. I could feel and see his fleshly presence! I „swallowed“ and turned back to the fire, immediately starting to feel bad again and quickly turned my head around again to look after Jesus and acknowledged disappointed that he had dematerialized and disappeared again.
After these experiences, I traveled further on, to the solstice festivities in Chiapas. During my stay in Chichen-Itza, I had my first healer experience, where I channeled energy with my hands into the root chakra of a Japanese woman on the pyramids.
I traveled further to Palenque, where I took some Holy Mushrooms. I hiked through the jungle up the mountain to the Pyramids. During this trip, I was led by a mysterious hidden guide, maybe the time-traveller, to encounter the astral-light-love-god on a little peak over a stream.
It was an Omni-color light shining through a round gate that showed me that everyone has gods light and love in themselves, and I later also learned that everything is made from this light and love and therefore spirited. I wanted to stare into this light on and on, and after it rose up into the skies I wanted to see it again and again, and so I tried a black magic trick from Carlos Castaneda’s books, in order to call god back, which made me fall on my head. I didn’t know then, that it was black magic, which I only learned later in life. Proceduring the move I fell backward on my head, I injured it and probably lost my „little soul“ (according to Peruvian shamans).
From there on I went on a wild „psychotic“ freedom ride adventure through Mexico and the United States until Germany.
In this freedom ride, I experienced a far diving into a totally meaningful, but not scary, spiritual reality, where everything had a special meaning towards me, even such simple things as towns names, but I also saw, maybe guided by the spirit, unexplainable things which were not hallucinations but parts of a maybe scientifical part of reality, like in a homeless shelter I woke up one night, went into the lobby and saw in front of an open door a queue of people standing, entering a room one by one and then them disappearing through some kind of buzzing massive flash of energy.
Some day, after arriving in Phoenix/Arizona, i dearly wanted to return to my homeland Germany/Europe and had the Idea that if I would tell the police that I have smuggled some drugs and would be convicted, so that they, because convicted aliens get expelled from the USA, would send me back home, so I found the nearest cop and told him that I smuggled a ton of cocain, and he said we will try, cause he somehow „knew“ that I was a homeless „bum“!
And then the next thing you know, I was put in pre-trial confinement which seemed to me to go on for days, but when i look back it was just a few hours.
Whence I was finally put before the judge, he asked me if i plead guilty and what I have done, I said that I plead guilty for smuggling one ton of cocaine in a truck, he looked at me and shaked his head and said „Not Guilty“!
So I went on the after-confinement wing of that prison and sat there awaiting my release, next to a guy in a ripped up blue overall, when I heared a voice say that’s an alien which I knew was the guy next to me. He and I sat there with our hands folded, when I felt something materializing in my hands. I looked down and saw a 5 Dollar Bill materializing/beaming from the alien sorcerers hands into mine. I got a little scared and thought if they would find after searching me for my release the dollar bill, I would be kept there for dealing drugs in the prison, so I dematerialized the 5 dollar bill and beamed it back to the alien sorcerer.
When I returned with the airplane to germany, on the airport in the flight-check-in i saw two suns, which I „knew“ were suns of two different parallel worlds one sun to left and one sun to the right of the airplane (but maybe it was just a miracle God made for the flight captain, like i had in the looneybin), and i knew if the airplane turned to the left I would stay in my world, but to my dismay the airplane turned to the right and I entered this world. I call my old world the golden free world with an onicolour god while this world is the blue prison universe with a white god. But somehow God also brought this world close to/combined it with my old world to bring me home and not to make to much disturbences in the reality of the time-space continuum!
Later back in Germany, while rearranging myself into everyday reality with the help of my then girlfriend, having long talks about my experiences and a lot of love-making, beer, and hash, and without the aid of neuroleptics, after one time trying out the neuroleptic Haldol which only had an adverse effect of making me time travel and a CAM practitioner who wanted to push me even further into another reality, I asked the Universe and God, after a long ride through heavens and hells, fantastic sights and unbelievable abysses for advice and got the name „slow temple“ for a music project. Whilst listening to the song „Starlight“ by Lou Reed and John Cale from the album „Songs For Drella“, I played with the words and put the first letters from the words of the chorus line,
(s)tar (l)ight (o)pen (w)ide,
together to the word slow, asked for an extension to that name and got the answer,
So I found my project name „slow temple“.
Not knowing what to do now, and how to further with my life, I tried to re-enter the system starting a multimedia designer education.
Trying to find answers for my life and seeing god again, I took some more mushrooms at home. The next day in school, still a little high from the previous day, I leaned against a windowsill of an open window and looked outside into the sky and for the first time in my life I saw some silver flying energy disk spaceships. Shortly after this experience, I had a nervous breakdown due to overworking and went to the looney bin. After weeks of taking neuroleptics and sobering out, I sat on the balcony of the ward and had a ciggie smoke in the evening. Staring seeking and calm into the starry night sky, a golden flying light captured my attention, and I thought, „…oh what a nice airplane“. I looked at the light some more moments and realized that it was pretty tiny and flew a perfectly straight line across the night sky, without that moving and grooving I was used to airplanes. I reconsidered my first thought and pondered awe-fully that it could maybe be a spaceship, whence I started to wave friendly at the light. It immediately stopped in the night sky and floated on a spot in the sky, when I sensed that they were checking me out. Then suddenly there seemed to open up a gate from which a growing golden light shone a huge beam of golden light on me, surrounded me and began to lift me up in the night sky towards the spaceship. I became excited and during my flight towards the spaceship, the astral bodies of Castaneda black magic sorcerers suddenly appeared at my side and with forceful power turned my head away from the spaceship. The aliens aborted the up beaming process, because they thought that I was afraid and because they don’t want to scare or hurt nobody, which I „Knew“ intiutivly.
Later on, I had many crazy magical and wild experiences and visions, like maybe flying energy people materializing before me, meeting Lucifer, hells being summoned upon me, experiencing pure divine love, everlasting cleansing sadness, and the highest joy/bliss, and a lot of other crazy stuff…
…In the closed ward of our psychiatry, for example, in the smoking room, one of the fellow patients sat beside me one night and showed me his empty palm. Then my fellow patient with this empty and open hand touched my arm and has materialized a cigarillo where previously was none and he has then smoked it.
Now after telling you the turkish sorcerers, and the alien sorcerers story, I must admit that I also had the misfortune of, one time in the closed wards garden, materializing some „Knoppers“ (a women then called me „our god“ because of that) , but I ate them myself, because I was so hungry (you don’t get enough to eat in the looneybin), and turned, probably with the help of a blessed christus-rosecross from Medugorje, some mineral water into „Gemišt“ Wine, which after some days I had enough off and couldn’t stand anymore of drinking Wine!
One night, on the balcony of my ward, I saw with my own non-hallucinating eyes, how the ALL-mighty moved the full moon about 10.000km, from my relativistic point ov view it was maybe 1m if i would paint it on a canvas, in an instant on the night sky!
One day, on an average day, I went for shopping in the supermarket, not feeling too well. As I stood in the queue at the checkout, I suddenly felt an overhelming total agape uncunditional love towards me from behind, and I knew this could only be dear good god, and as I turned around there stood this old little fella buying sweets for the kids. You may ask why he bought the sweets and didn’t materialize them, maybe, just maybe, he wanted to be that old little regular fella this day, just one of us regulars peeps, and showing to us that he still exists.
I also always surmised, that my (former) psychiatrists had something to do with me getting a „psychosis“, whenever I announced to them, that I wanted to stop the „medication“.
One day I went for a pill refill to my actual psychiatrist and disclosed to her that I reduced my dosage and want to stop the „medication“ completely.
Nothing important happened shortly after I left her office. But while I was riding home on the bus, the bus stopped at a halt at a nuclear power plant construction company (Areva), whence suddenly opened up a portal to a parallel dimension, to a, I think, mostly energetic dimension. I heard the voices of my angels speak, to the spirit of the psychiatrist (and I also saw the spirit/astral body/higher self of that psychiatrist): „Miss doctor please don’t play with that“, whence I saw her spirit use something like a crystal like object. I rode on and noticed a guy that had stepped in the bus at „Areva“, and a thought came to my mind: „That’s a cop“. I watched the guy a long time while the other dimension was still open, when I realized that the guy had something to do with opening the portal, because later, while staring at the guy, I could see him getting uncomfortable and the other dimension slowly disappearing, and the portal ended when he stepped out of the bus at „Siemens Gerätewerk“ (an electronics company).
Then i „Knew“ that this guy had some kind of device, that was a help for my psychiatrist opening that portal, and now I know that he was a „psycho cop“ controlling the „psychos“ to use their fatal „medicine“, because we are a threat to the status quo of the system!
Maybe she called him on the phone, or they had some telepathic contact, but now I know the technology for V2K and similar things are available, either invented, or stolen from shot down alien spaceships, or traded with aliens.
They have also the technology for the psychological and physical wellbeing and other aspects of your body and the reality outside your body. So they don’t need to do black magic anymore but can manipulate the reality of you and around you with technology!
Now I have somehow embraced both realities and am living quasi with one foot in everyday reality and with the other in spiritual reality.
Addendum: Carlos Castaneda and his books destroyed my life.
Greetings in the name of Jah Rastafari (or whatever you like to call her/him/it), everliving, ever clear, ever sure, ever peaceful, all loving, all merciful!
Everybody (!) is special and possesses their own medicine/talent/mission/uniqueness they can act out given by the almighty! Supported by NDE’ers, by my experiences in life and, my angels and my medicine wo/men I met in the Americas!
Robi „Angellovechildlikesoul“ Smrdelj